Posted on Dec 21,2021
How To Identify An Abusive Boss and How-To Keep Yourself Strong While Dealing with One
Attributing to the lack of sympathy we witness many incidences in our life that are pure diabolic and wrenches our heart. Be it bombing and killing innocent people for increasing terror, or entertaining oneself by torturing animals. The thing that needs consideration here is the relation between one’s approach/action (humiliating, torturing, shouting, abusing) and its epicentre (frustration, pleasure, deadlines, pressure, entertainment) and whenever our approach shatters someone, we need to keep that in check.
However, a lot of people are due to sheer lack of emotional intelligence, awareness and education on mindfulness choose to feed their egos by demonstrating undue behaviour with their social status and powers. The spectrum is too wide yet here we are addressing an integral part of our life; office. It is the place that runs our house, supports our lifestyles, pays our bills, sponsors our holidays, gives assurance to our future and whatnot. Yet a large number of people face abusive bosses, who comment personally and have no sense of regard towards their subordinates. If are any of your friends/relatives are experiencing the same this write up with assisting you in finding how to cope with such issues if going league or quitting the job is not a substitute.
How common is bullying at the workplace?
Though bullying in schools is a common topic of conversation, few people express worry about bullying in the workplace. Workplace bullying is, unfortunately, more widespread than you would assume. According to studies undertaken by Judith Lynn Fisher-Blando of the University of Phoenix, about 75% of employees are victims of workplace bullying at some point in their careers. "Workplace Bullying: Aggressive Behaviour and Its Effect on Job Satisfaction and Productivity," according to the study, reveals some troubling facts about workplace harassment.
Why do bosses bully their employees?
So, what makes managers turn into bullies? Perhaps they are anxious, are under pressure from their superiors, or are having conflicts with coworkers that are affecting their relationships with their direct reports. It's not all about work; some bully employers have a history of parental abuse, while others just have trouble managing their emotions. We've just discovered that certain employees are more prone than others to be bullied. Negative or antagonistic employees can bring out the worst in their managers. If they look weak or fragile, employees with poor self-esteem are more likely to be bullied.
Some of the examples of bullying are:
● Harassing or harassing subordinates or coworkers.
● Making improper contact with employees or requesting sexual favours from them.
● Requesting that employees run personal errands.
● Interfering with and obstructing colleagues' or workers' capacity to operate efficiently.
● Forcing coworkers or subordinates to violate workplace norms.
Who gets bullied mostly?
According to an article released by Forbes, "People become targets (of bullying) because they threaten the bully in some way. They are frequently more competent, highly adept, have a significantly Increased EQ, or are just liked by more people." According to researchers, persons who fit into the ecosystem are more likely to be bullied at work. Some people are bullied because of their ethnic differences, while others are bullied because their work ethics are different and better than those of their peers, and they have the potential to outperform their peers—but whatever the reason for the bullying, the malicious treatment can end up leaving victims mentally and emotionally disturbed and totally exhausted, leading them to take extreme measures.
Types of bullying
Verbal. Mockery, disgrace, jokes, defamation, and other forms of verbal abuse are examples.
Intimidating. This might involve threats, workplace social exclusion, espionage, or other intrusions of privacy.
Related to work performance. Unjustified blaming, job sabotage or interference, and stealing or claiming credit for ideas are all examples.
Retaliatory. Speaking up about bullying might result in allegations of lying, greater marginalisation, denial of promotions, or other forms of retaliation.
Institutional. When a workplace supports, enables or even encourages bullying, it is referred to as institutional bullying. Unrealistic output goals forced overtime, or singling out individuals who can't keep up are all examples of bullying.
How abusive bosses can impact employee’s performance
● When you leave the office, the impacts of workplace bullying continue. Bullying may lead to a variety of physical and mental health issues, including anxiety, high blood pressure, panic disorder, stress, insomnia, and ulcers.
● Bullied employees are unable to do their tasks to their full potential. Inability to work or focus, loss of self-esteem, difficulty making judgments, and poorer productivity are all examples of performance concerns.
● Bad employers don't appreciate their staff, and their people know it. As a result, they quit putting up their best effort. When you don't feel appreciated and respected at work, you're less likely to bring your best self to work and thrive on your assignments.
Signs your boss is abusive
● They belittle your efforts
An aggressive supervisor is a master at insulting staff in order to make them doubt themselves and generate unhealthy rivalry among his own employees. This results in an extremely unfavourable and often stressful work atmosphere. If your supervisor continually disparages you, your ideas, or your work, you should probably look for another job where your contributions are valued.
● Comes between you and your success
Bullies don't want you to flourish because they'll lose control over you if you do. As a consequence, they may penalise you for mistakes that aren't your fault or bring up earlier blunders during a debate to shift responsibility.
They might also prevent you from applying for a promotion, a transfer, or more training. They may even micromanage or over-control your job or tasks. Bullies that are more manipulative will offer you promotions or increases in exchange for more labour, but they will never follow through on their claims.
● They yells
Something is "wrong" with your supervisor, and he or she is likely generating a hostile work atmosphere if you hear yelling in the workplace. Conversations may get hot at times, and we're all capable of losing our cool now and again... However, screaming and angry outbursts on a daily basis are not natural and should not be accepted by anyone.
● They immediate you
Threatening to fire you as a means of maintaining power and control is an example of intimidating behaviour. A manager who is bullying you may make threatening gestures or threaten you with bodily assault. Towering over you, violating your space, and offering threatening stares are all instances of intimidating behaviour.
How to tackle the abusive behaviour of your boss
● Do your work and avoid being a target
Avoid becoming a target – or, by consequence, a victim – if you decide to stay. You may believe that this entails keeping your head down and staying out of trouble (which is sometimes important), but it may also imply the exact opposite. Do your job – and a good job at it. Think about going to whatever length to assist your boss's success (but don't feel obligated to do so). It will make you less of a target, and people will note your competence in the face of terrible leadership - and believe me, you won't be the only one who notices.
● Keep records in detail
Keep careful, precise notes if you are the victim of improper or abusive behaviour - and don't exaggerate. It's possible that you'll be asked to back up a complaint, whether it's your own or someone else's. In any scenario, your ability to make specific, comprehensive allusions to personal experiences can help you make a stronger argument.
Vague allusions, unsupported stories, hearsay, and third-party opinions do nothing to forward a complaint. Your case will be strengthened if you can demonstrate a pattern of hazardous behaviour through verified evidence. You're not going to get very far if you don't keep precise and accurate records.
● Play with your gestures
Facial expression and body language are excellent techniques to cope with a bully employer in a silent but effective manner. Every time you have, turn your back on your employer. At all times, give your employer the side of your body or the rear of your body. When you have to speak with your supervisor face-to-face, concentrate on rising your shoulders and head. This stance conveys that you're not afraid and that you're open to speaking.
● Develop an emotional buffer zone
Recognise that you are not compelled to act on your own emotional responses to your circumstance. Imagine a "gap" between your thoughts and how you choose to cope with them through your actions. You're more likely to say or do anything unpleasant or harmful to yourself if you don't. Keep an eye on the buttons your employer is pushing, but resist the want to respond to his or her emotional troubles. Understand that you always have a choice in how you handle your emotions in your own actions.
● Inform the higher authorities
Through your paperwork and discussions with your coworkers and boss, demonstrate to your supervisors and human resources that you have done everything you can on your own to cope with and abate your employer's flagrantly abusive behaviour. Explain how bullying has affected your physical, emotional, and mental health, as well as how it has harmed your professional performance.
Here is WellEQ, we can talk about abusive bosses and how should be your possible behaviour around them. We hope this will help you in future and uplift your career with the right elevation, in the right direction.